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9 Days of Seclusion: ONE

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“And because the Lord had closed her womb, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. Elkanah her husband would say to her, “Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don’t you eat? Why are you down hearted? Don’t I mean more to you than ten sons?” Once when they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up.” ~1 Samuel 1:6-9
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(Inspired by Hannah, mother of the prophet Samuel)
God, I’ve done all I know to do, and yet your peace has not found me.
I’m done trying to convince my subconscious that I’m fine. I’m not.
All I feel
is an emptiness
I cannot express.
Food has lost its taste.
Beauty has lost its breath.
Victory has lost its touch.
But no more, for I have just enough within me for ONE…
ONE last stand. ONE last decision. ONE last cry.
No more pacifying my purpose to death.
No more sinking under skepticism and settling for safe.
No more feeling selfish because my spirit craves the taste of a dream fulfilled.
Yes… I know they’re watching… but I’m too weary to care.
This is MY moment
to ASK,
to SEEK,
to KNOCK at the door of the ONE True God.